Simplicity is being me.

CityofLeedsRose:

It’s important that we spend time finding out who we are in Christ.

I should spend more time doing this!

Thank you to Alienhippy for reminding me of a few things. Xx

Originally posted on Alienhippy's Blog:

Photo taken with my mobile

Being Still, making the time to find who I am in Christ, “Listening through the Loops” that are constantly cycling in my head from the hectic run of life. Being Still is something that I really need. I’ve come to realise that I’m not made to be constantly stressed, I don’t work well when my mind is constantly looping with emotional overload or any form of anxiety.

I sometimes find myself filling all the gaps in life with things that don’t really need to be there. I try to avoid all the silent moments and it’s almost like I’m afraid to not keep busy. It’s only when I actually make myself stop, be still, ponder and reflect that then I see clearly. I see that I can sometimes add worries and stress and make myself a lovely lot of my own confusion.

I wrote a…

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This picture tells a story

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Okay so the picture shows the remnants of my baking today.  I have been busy making cakes for an event this weekend.  I live in a terrace and the kitchen is a galley one. We are doing a lot of work in the garden and replacing the fence with help from the neighbours.

When hubby came back from work this morning (he’s on early shift this week) he got changed and went out into the back garden. This meant he had to pass me whilst I’m in the kitchen making the cakes. Back and forth. 

I had finished one batch and was in the middle of the second batch. Since I’m baking for an event I was doubling up the amounts of ingredients.  I was in the middle of counting out the amount when he came in and asked me to do something.  “I can’t now!” Was my response “I’m in the middle of baking”

This interruption rattled me. Everything then seemed to go wrong. I ended up putting in too much mixed spice into the mix. Also the mixture seemed very stiff. Why? I was trying to work out.  My anger was bristling.  I was working out what to say to him if he interrupted me again. The cakes went into the oven and I heard the door open.

“You’ve been productive! :)” Hubby says. Grrr!  Is my response.  He then starts saying how clever I am, how wonderful and beautiful I am. How glad he’s married me. My anger evaporated and I don’t do anger well I get very weepy.  So my tears start falling and he gives me a big hug and a kiss.

“I’ve made a mess and it’s gone wrong” I wail.

“It’s okay.  I know you do the muppet Swedish Chef thing. I’m sure the cakes will be alright”. He reassures me some more before going back out the door.

I clean up and making a brew for us all. Later on after the cakes have cooled I cut us both a piece.  “It’s very crumbly” I comment. “It is a bit” he agrees “but it’s delicious” As we talk about where the cake has gone wrong I realised I miss counted the eggs. I needed two extra.

He apologises for disturbing me.  I thank him for his kind loving words and that’s what this picture reminds me of.

Prevention is better than cure

CityofLeedsRose:

I’m beginning to fall in love with having handmade socks. As yet I’ve not had to darn them.

Making notes though. …just in case ;)

Originally posted on Recipe For A Yarn:

I’m having a very productive bank holiday weekend indeed. There has been bread baking, spinning, plying and erm, *cough* sock mending.

I’m quite, completely and utterly rubbish at the sock mending malarkey. Socks tend to sit ignored for a while in my craft box while I procrastinate for an age or three before reluctantly attempting to mend them. I think my lack of darning skills has a lot to do with the procrastination. I did think that buying my nifty little vintage darning loom might help but I found the instructions quite baffling. One day I hope to do a course with Tom Van Deijnen and then magically it might all click into place but I fear I might soon run out of socks in the meantime.

While I was botching mending one of my socks it occurred to me that perhaps the answer lie in reinforcing the socks before…

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Counting down

Dear Reader

It seems so long ago when I first signed up for this but now there is 17 sleeps left to go! 17 sleeps before I head back up north and experience the Cherish Conference – EXCITED is not the word!

It’s been an aim of mine to attend for the past couple of years. Last year I decided that this year would be the year I go as part of my *cough* birthday celebrations (it ends in an 0).  The theme this year is Known.

It seems perfectly apt for me at the moment with things that I’m going through.  Some things that I’m relearning about me and some things that I’m discovering about me. Slowly but surely changes are happening.

As part of the bumph that came through has a countdown in it. Today’s thing to do  is to read the article “Know Him” that is in the brochure. I took it with me to read on the bus.

In the opening letter there is a line that really speaks to me:

Known not just for who we presently are but also for who we are becoming

Charlotte Gambill

For who we are becoming.  Every day God is shaping me and refining me. My prayer for Cherish is that I receive clear direction where my life is going and what my role is in life. With my birthday coming up I see it as a shift. I need to find out who I am. I need to know who me is. So here begins my journey. 

Blessings x

a treasured gift

CityofLeedsRose:

What a beautiful gift – all made by hand. Such talent!

Originally posted on Kate Davies Designs:

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What’s this? A handknitted hoose?

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With flowers in the garden . . .

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. . . and a wee gate . . .

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. . leading to a horse-shoe adorned front door . . .

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. . . there are flowers in the windows too . . .

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. . . shrubs round the side . . .

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. . . a tiled roof, and a jolly chimney!

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. . . the back of the hoose is just as inviting as the front

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. . . and it also has a useful function . . .

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To keep my teapot warm!

This hoose is a gift I was really, really touched to receive. Long-term readers of this blog may remember this post , which I wrote in 2009, following a visit to the Royal Edinburgh Repository and Self Aid Society – also known as the Treasure Trove – on Castle…

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Vicious Circles

Dear Reader

I’m giving you a heads up as in this post I’m going to be talking about depression and anxiety.  Reason why I am giving you a warning as I know that for some reading this will possibly trigger your own thoughts.  However before you disappear please click here as it gives you tips on handling anxiety.

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Over the past few years or more on and off I have been suffering with bouts of depression.  Mostly during the winter months and obviously as a woman the monthlies when the hormones rage. Over the past couple of years it’s got worse and anxiety is becoming an issue. So much so that last year the doctor wanted to put me on medication.  I decided that there must be another way.  So I went first for counselling and then for CBT.

Counselling helped to some extent as it gave me someone I could talk to about my issues, my worries and concerns over OH illness and it’s implications. That had to stop when the CBT course started. 

It took a few attempts to get onto the course as since I was not suicidal I was considered low down on the list. The course was a roller coaster but a light bulb did go off. I took on board what was said and carried on. 

However somewhere over the past few months things have gone awry. I know they have as well basically my body is now telling me that I have to tackle this head on. I have to make changes.

For the past two months I’ve been suffering with chronic pins and needles.  I thought that it was connected with the problems that I’ve been having with my hip. The doctor was convinced that it was lack of vitamin B12 due to my Coeliac Disease.  The blood results came back fine.  So she referred me to Neurology.

I saw them yesterday. He basically said that my pins and needles are caused by anxiety. By getting my anxiety under control they will get better.

So I need to make positive life changes. This means I need to watch out for my triggers. I’m beginning to understand the things that trigger my anxiety. Baby steps is what I have to take in order to tackle it bit by bit. 

Surrounding myself with positive people who I can talk to. This means surrounding myself with people who build me up not knock me down.  Those who give back and not those who take. Those even if they are going through bad times can still support me because they are for me not against me.  I need to avoid those who drain me and are negative. 

Keeping up my exercise and increase it. I find it hard to switch off my brain so I’m going to introduce yoga into my timetable as I’ve read that this is supposed to help you relax.  Also I’ll be focusing on the moves and breathing so hopefully no thoughts will get in.

Time management is a key.  One of the things that set me off is lack of time.  I always liked to be busy but being busy has many draw backs. I’ve decided to limit myself and plan my time better.  So I’m making a few rules to limit myself –  no more then 3 nights out a week (including Zumba and knit night) and having a TV/PC curfew of 9.30pm.  Hopefully this will help free up my days off so I can focus on chores.  OK so chores may not be a big deal to some but for me to get the motivation to do them is and if they aren’t done I get anxious and stressed.  By keeping closed lists doing little each day will also free up time for me to de-stress and chill, to have a laugh and to work on goals.  It should also enable me to get to bed on time and get enough sleep.

It’s going to be a long journey but a journey that I want/need/willing to make. Step by step I can do this and I can beat it.

“Maroon, yellow, blue, gold and gray”

CityofLeedsRose:

Every so often I do go through my stash and I must admit that it does take effort. Well done Dee! :)

High 5! Now put your feet up, relax and have a cup of tea :) xx

Originally posted on littleredyarn:

I have too much yarn.

Well, that’s not entirely true. I still probably have way too much yarn, but today I have a lot less than I did yesterday. Like, four giant Ziploc bags’ worth.

I’d been meaning to go through the yarn closet for a long time now, but if you’re a regular reader of this little blog o’ mine, you know that the past couple of months have been just a wee bit challenging. And the last thing I felt like doing was pulling out all of the bags and sorting through everything I’ve accumulated over the past couple of years.

Not because of the physical work, mind you. It was just the whole idea of sorting through every skein of yarn because, to be honest, there was a lot of poor yarn purchases on my part and I know I’m not alone in this. I also know…

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